Work Work Work [Blog Blog Blog]

Holy crap, has it already been a week?

I guess they say time flies when you’re having fun, so my life must be a blast. I mean, it is, but there’s another, lesser known saying that goes something like, “time flies when you’re dedicating a big portion of your time to doing work you enjoy because delivering pizzas is pretty much just like sitting down to read a book when you’re on the road all day listening to something you like.” It goes something like that…

It’s that warning every children’s movie and television show has ever given us. There’s the character’s super lame mom and/or dad who’s always working to give their kids a better life and it takes them until the end of the movie to realize they’re at work too often and all they really need is to spend time with their kids. Before you know it, you’re forty, you’re the boss now and make all the money your family would ever need, real shame you never see them. That’s just how it feels right now though, I know I’m being dramatic.

Summer has just flown by too fast. I can’t complain. As much as I just did complain a whole lot about work wasting my time, it’s been great. I’m making a lot of money for the honeymoon. I’m ahead on my bills to the point where I actually have money in my bank account that I could spend but haven’t. It feels like that hasn’t happened since I decided to become a student.

I’m always learning and progressing while delivering pizzas, listening to great literature or podcasts or just working on and developing my story-telling process in general. I keep getting the “why you still work at Pizza Hut?” question. I say Pizza Hut because, even after working at this place for three years (the longest I’ve ever had a continuous job I should add), people still think I work at Pizza Hut. The answer is, delivering pizzas is the greatest job in the world. If we lived in a perfectly communistic society in which everyone got paid equal wages no matter what job they did, I would deliver pizzas until I died. It’s that good of a job.

But, I’m thinking about quitting after we get back from the honeymoon… As much as I love it, it’s not worth delivering pizzas in blizzards, risking my life to get people food who are going to stiff me.

Before I continue, here’s a mini-rant: If you don’t tip your delivery driver, you are a less-than-human monster. People say like “Oh, if you voted for Trump, unfriend me right now.” I don’t care too much about that, but if you don’t tip your driver, unfriend me and hope I don’t find out because I will either kick your ass or ruin your life somehow, because you are a monster. If you don’t have enough money to tip your delivery driver, you don’t have enough money to order delivery. I know it’s not like this everywhere, but a lot of delivery drivers work on tip wages. Yes, that’s right, just like waiters and waitresses. Not tipping any of these professions is saying to their faces, “You don’t deserve a living wage for the work you do.” This makes you a monster.

Alright, rant over, sorry. Had to say it. Have to say it every once in a while.

But, yeah, I think I wanna quit Dominoes… It might only be until winter is over, we’ll see what happens. Life is a mystery and all. There’s just been too many car wrecks and I don’t want to put myself up to that kind of risk for friggin’ pizza, you know? Making people drive to work in bad weather is shitty enough. Making a person drive to work then spend all day driving in hazardous conditions because your company might make a few extra bucks is… I don’t know the word and hesitate to think of many to call the man who signs my paychecks right now, so I’ll stop there. Plus I just hate working for a corporation, you know? But that’s a whole different story. I want to keep delivering, but for a local restaurant you know? I wanna be part of that whole millennial group that’s killing big business that everyone thinks exists.

I sort of want to go work at this factory that makes micro-chips. That sounds like sciencey fun. Or, I’ve been thinking about becoming an electrician… I don’t know. I just want to write books, not code, and find some day job that allows me enough time and money to keep writing books until I sell my first Harry Potter level novel (sweet dreams are made of this). I’m going to go back to school next fall, don’t worry. This is all just the figuring out my life part of this year-long break I’m taking.


As long as I’m talking about work, let me shout out to the second job I’ve been working all summer.

I started working at the Queen’s Pantry when I was… seventeen or eighteen I wanna say. Worked there every year in Colorado while we were on the road, even if it was just being part of the throw wall. Being back in this familiar place has been pretty great. Not only am I making money for the honeymoon, at the fair no less, but I get to be in the back-of-house, which is my favorite part-of-house (nothing against waiters or hawkers, I just hate people).

When I started working there ages ago, Pokey always said, “You just wait, one day this kitchen will be mine.” Low and behold, he is running the bitch and I get to work for one of my best friends on the planet. He hires rennies that are worth a damn and pull their weight and, I might add, are pretty friggin’ cool. They’re all new to me, but it’s been great getting to know them over the last few weekends, Josh, Kate, Lloyd, Dylan, Mike (not really a renny, but close enough). Hell, even the weekenders don’t suck (I’ve been making weekender jokes the whole time because I think it’s hilarious that I’m technically a weekender).

The work is fast-paced, often chaotic, greasy, sweaty and I’ve really missed it. There’s nothing like working in a kitchen to get your blood pumping, your limbs limber and put that old familiar ache in your ankle that tells you you’re getting older.

Don’t worry friends, I’m not going to run off and join the festival… again.

It’s like… I miss the people and the travel, but not the actual Renaissance Festival itself, if that makes sense. It’s great and I feel blessed that I’ve made some new friends this season, but it’s also lit a fire up under my ass to travel more. Iceland is just around the corner, so my wanderlust remains quenched, but it’s not ever really something that goes away.

I want to live in New York City for a winter, just to have a Christmas there. I want to live off of irradiated fish from a house boat in the Pacific Northwest. I want to learn Japanese and deliver pizzas in Kyoto. Life is too short not to. The want to travel is always there if it’s ever been in you this hard. Work is just a means by which you take great vacations, anyone who tells you otherwise is trying to get you to buy into their pyramid scheme.

Well. I should go. I’m up to chapter twenty-three of Hell Cat. That’s such a big number, but not really, you know? Trying to write a short novel, but it still feels too long. Anyway. Gotta go, love your life because it’s shorter than you think. See you next week, fam.


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